Close your eyes and think back to that New Year’s resolution you made January 1st. Maybe you had a goal of losing 10 pounds, 20 pounds, or even 30 pounds. Maybe you had a goal to go to the gym every day because you were going to get into shape this year. Or maybe you were going to stop smoking, drinking, or break another unhealthy habit. Now, how did you do with this resolution? The year is 3/4ths over. Have you succeeded?
Many people struggle to keep their resolutions. In fact, probably the majority of people drop their resolution after about a month. Why? Well, I think one main reason is that most people when setting a goal say to themselves something like, “I am going to lose weight this year because if I lose weight, then I will be happy and love myself.” Sound familiar? We all have a tendency to do this. We often set our goals up for failure by stating this If-then statement. And if by chance we achieve our goal, we often do not find the happiness we were looking for and sometimes even revert back to old habits or gain that weight back. It is vital before starting any journey toward a goal to first learn to love yourself as you are and find happiness in the now and happiness in the process of growth and change. There is no truth in the statement, “If I achieve this, then I will be happy.” You must find happiness and self-love and self-worth now! You are in control of your happiness. Happiness begins within you. Have a mindset that life happens from you and through you, not to you. Avoid going through life associating happiness with that which is outside of you. If you love yourself and are grateful for who you are now, you can achieve anything you set your mind to.
So, how do we do this? An effective place to start is to examine our inner voice. What is that voice repeatedly telling you? “I am ugly the way I look now.” “I will never be able to achieve this goal because I always fail.” “I can’t do this.” “I am worthless.” “How could anyone love me?” Well, guess what? If this is how your inner voice talks, then you will not have any success achieving goals or being truly happy. You must change how you talk to yourself. Develop a positive and encouraging inner voice. Tell yourself positive affirmations like, “I am beautiful just the way I am.” “I can achieve any goal.” “I am worthy.” “I am enough.” “I choose to be happy now.” “I am strong and confident.” Stand in front of a mirror and say these affirmations to yourself out loud. Look yourself in the eyes and say out loud repeatedly “I love you” until you firmly believe it. Another way to generate happiness now is to have a gratitude practice. Each day, close your eyes and think about what you are grateful for. This could be people in your life, an event, your home, your job. And also, always identify what you are grateful for about yourself. Then, don’t just think about it, really feel it. Feel that gratitude in your heart.
Another reason we fail at achieving our goals is because we look at setbacks as a reflection of ourselves. In other words, we identify with the failure. “My goal is failing, so I am a failure.” DON’T DO THIS! There will always be setbacks. You must reframe setbacks as learning experiences. They are not a reflection of who you are. It just means you must pause, re-evaluate, learn, and adjust. Thomas Edison, one of the greatest inventors, once said, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” And one of the greatest spiritual masters of all time, Yoda, once said, "The greatest teacher, failure is." If we are going to identify with anything, we should be identifying with our goal itself. For example, if I want to be in shape, I’m going to adopt the mindset of I AM in shape, I AM that gym goer, and I AM that healthy eater. I want to run a marathon. Well, I AM a marathon runner. I want a slim, sexy body. I’m gonna act like I already have that slim, sexy body. By doing this, you are programing your mind to achieve your goal. And you’re changing your vibration to attract what you desire. You are becoming your goal. Then, the steps to achieve that goal mentally do not seem so overwhelming. You go to the gym because you are in shape. You eat healthy because you are healthy. You train for that marathon because you are a marathon runner. It is who you are, so that is just what you do. See how that works? Also, think of how other people will benefit from you achieving your goal. This generates good karma for success as well.
Lastly, it is very important to periodically stop and celebrate how far you have come in your journey. Don’t judge yourself by how far you still need to go.
I firmly believe that all of this is so important in our wellness journeys. In fact, self-love, acceptance of where we are at now, happiness in the now, gratitude, and mindset are absolutely vital for success and goal attainment. Don’t skip these steps! You must have this solid foundation in order achieve your full potential and vitality.
Please comment below with your thoughts or with topics you would like me to cover next.
Wishing you health and happiness with love,
Tasha
P.S. I recommend the book The Code of the Extraordinary Mind by Vishen Lakhiani for further guidance on mindset for success.
Author
